I saw Wicked for the first time in October. While, at the time, the song, “For Good” was particularly touching, its lyrics struck an even more compelling “chord” in the wake of the new year.
“Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
But because I knew you.
I have been changed for good.”
The song reminds me of the different criteria against which we measure change — permanence (as in “for good”) or progress (as in “for the better”). I think that criteria may be flawed or, at least, deserves a second look.
Interest in “permanence,” in the context of a New Year, is understandable. Successfully embarking on a change depends on some faith that it will “stick.” Yet:
- Sometimes, the goals we set are not sustainable.
- Sometimes, permanence isn’t necessary or advisable. A change that works for now may not be the right change for later.
- Sometimes, our hyper-focus on permanence can detract from the short-term gains.
These [short-term] gains or progress is another way in which to consider 2012 (or any year’s) resolutions. Embarking on a change depends on some conviction that the change will yield “better” conditions. Ideas about “progress” also can be short sighted.
- Sometimes, exaggerated or irrational levels of expectation leave us behind instead of ahead.
- Sometimes, the voices of others silence our own sense of “headway.”
- Sometimes, progress in the traditionally “positive” sense isn’t the point.
This notion of “positive change,” thanks in part to the words of a Broadway song, intrigues me the most. The litmus test through which we assess “for the better” seems narrow – based typically on a “good” outcome. Yet, situations arise in our lives (and in Wicked) when a change evokes conditions of sadness, anger, despair, emptiness (the list goes on). Their burdens can be intolerable. We wish them away with all our might or a click of our red slippers.
Truth be told, these experiences (the end of a relationship, the end of a job, a life or work transition), despite their inherent “bad”ness, can be our teachers “for good.” It’s the bravest of souls (a.k.a. students) who actually invite, accept, and make difficult changes in their lives realizing, ironically, that change in any direction can still mean permanent progress.
I stood among audience members at the Gershwin Theater last Fall and applauded a musical AND the message its music conveyed. One song, against the backdrop of a story about “good” and “bad” witches, left me with new ideas about “good” and “bad.” This same message resonates at the beginning of a new year when changes can mean more than “better” and “for good.” If you’re ready to make new or broader meaning of changes n 2012, consider the following.
- What changes are on your mind for 2012?
- To what extent, do these changes have to be “for good” or permanent?
- To what extent, are these changes about positive “for the better” progress?
- What additional change opportunities exist — ones that may be less “good” but still leave you changed “for good?”